How to achieve happiness? This is surely a question that everyone reading this short post has asked themselves at one point and, chances are, there was never a definite answer. The thing is that happiness is somewhat paradoxical, because if you make it your goal to be happy in life, you probably never will truly achieve it. On the other hand, if you accept that happiness is too illusory of a goal and instead focus on something more tangible that still interests you, it’s highly possible that your life would be a lot happier.
Then again, happiness is certainly not something that’s beyond a person’s control. The issue is that most of us search for it in the wrong places. We are conditioned to seek happiness in money, objects, relationships, achievements, and other external factors. But when you really stop to think about it, happiness is a subjective feeling, a state of the mind, so it only makes sense that it is the mind where we should be looking for it and not the outside world. That is not to say that things outside of us cannot make us happy - quite the contrary - but everything in the world is fleeting and very little of it is under our control, so if we cling to the notion that something in that world should be the sole source of our happiness, we’d often find ourselves feeling miserable.
Of course, all that was said thus far doesn’t get us any closer to answering the main question of how to achieve happiness. I wish that there was a simple answer to this, but the truth is that this is a philosophical question that much wiser men have failed to answer in a fashion that would satisfy everyone. That said, we can learn from humanity’s wisdom and collective experience to provide a couple of pieces of advice that may not give you eternal happiness, but will help you live a happier life.
Chase experiences, not money
We’ve all heard the saying that “money doesn’t make you happy” and while I agree with its general message, the saying itself is either wrong or, at the very least, incomplete. You see, money, by itself, just being there, will probably not make you super happy. It can make you feel good about yourself, but it won’t truly provide you with happiness… unless you decide to spend it.
Yes, I do in fact believe that you can buy happiness! For example, you can buy tickets to a concert of your favorite band, you can pay for a trip to an exotic country on the other side of the world, and you can use money to go skydiving. And all of those are examples of experiences that will last for a lifetime, making you feel fulfilled and happy that you’ve had the opportunity to do those things. In a sense, we are our memories, and the more exciting, interesting, and thrilling ones we have, the happier we’ll feel at the end of the day. So yes, chasing money for the sake of it is not likely to make you a particularly happy person in the long term, but using money, time, effort, and other resources that you have to make your life rich in experiences will invariably do that.
Like who you see in the mirror
I firmly believe that, in order for someone to be happy, they first need to like themselves. Obviously, for everyone, this would mean something different. Some people value physical appearance over everything else, while others put a lot of importance on a person’s intelligence and knowledge. Regardless of what qualities you deem important, in order to live a happier life, it’s necessary that you strive to become the embodiment of those qualities. After all, you are the only person with whom you spend 24 hours of the day, so if you do not like that person, you are a lot more likely to be unhappy. And I promise you, there’s nothing as fulfilling and exciting as seeing how you are growing into your ideal for a person. Of course, you’ll never reach that ideal, but here’s the point where you must remind yourself that perfection is a direction and not a destination.
Excitement will make you happier than happiness
One huge misconception that people have regarding happiness is that it is a state that they can be in all the time. This is something that’s simply not possible, if not for anything else, then for the reason that you cannot constantly have happy hormones getting released in your brain. The emotion called happiness is fickle. It comes and goes and that’s the beauty of it - it’s quite literally the reward after all the work you’ve done to achieve it, but even if the external thing that makes you happy stays with you, its ability to stimulate your happiness will fade over time. That is why the true key to being happy is to not focus on that final state of happiness, but to focus on the excitement that your journey towards it is causing you.
Excitement for something that lies in the future is a beautiful thing. It is a powerful positive emotion caused by something that doesn’t even exist in the current moment, yet is still able to fuel you and make you look into the future with hope-filled eyes. And this is all because of our brain’s ability to imagine, which further proves that happiness comes from within and not from the outside. So, as a final piece of advice in this short post, seek and find things in your life that make you excited about the future, and you'll have a happier life.
Conclusion
In conclusion, the pursuit of happiness is a complex and ever-evolving journey. While external factors can certainly contribute to our well-being, true happiness lies in cultivating inner contentment and embracing the present moment. By shifting our focus from acquiring material possessions to fostering meaningful connections, practicing gratitude, and prioritizing self-care, we can embark on a path that leads us to lasting joy and fulfillment. Remember, happiness is not a destination, but rather a state of mind that can be nurtured and cultivated throughout our lives. So let us embrace the beauty of this pursuit and find happiness in the here and now.